Casino Quotes Funny

  1. Casino Quotes Funny
  2. Funny Gambling Sayings
  3. The Movie Casino Quotes

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Gambling has been enjoyed by mankind since before the written record of history. Now that’s quite some time. So, with it having been around for so long, it’s had plenty said about it, and we’re revealing to you some of the best gambling quotes from across the years.

Casino Quotes Funny

We’ve got some downright funny winning quotes, others are more morose, others still are insightful, and the rest? Well, they may just offer you a new way of thinking.

Here's a quick look at some of the greatest quotes on betting ever said (or written).

Eat your betting money but don't bet your eating money.

Who doesn’t love a good ol’ play on words? Especially when their simplicity reveals such profound wisdom. The idea is simple and just as relevant to your prince as it is to your pauper. Go wild with the winnings you get from gambling and spend it how you please, but don’t put the money for your food and rent into a bet.

The best throw of the dice is to throw them away.
– Italian Proverb, 1790 (first recorded in writing).

Popular amongst those who don’t like gambling or risk-taking. And, as Italy was, and still is, very Catholic, it’s no shock that they claimed this proverb. You never know where the dice will land, and this proverb asks why you should bother trying your luck.

The appeal and temptation is acknowledged, after all the dice are already in your hand, but you can still walk away. You lose the chance of a potential win, but you can be certain you’ll suffer no loss. Gamblers prefer to live by, 'nothing ventured, nothing gained', and give themselves over to Lady Luck!

In a bet, there is a fool and a thief.

The cold light of day shone on any bet. A harsh approach, it suggests that the winner, the thief, lured in the innocent fool and robbed them.

While there can only be one winner, usually the bookmaker or casino, and the odds are stacked against the gambler, it’s all in the name of fun. If you go in knowing all this and set limits, it’s hard to call you a fool.

A dollar picked up in the road is more satisfaction to us than the 99 which we had to work for, and the money won at Faro or in the stock market snuggles into our hearts in the same way.

Author of the great American novel, The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, Mark Twain made a lot of money from his successful writing career but after a couple of disastrous investments had to file for bankruptcy.

A man after our own hearts, he says that it's always sweeter to make a dollar on a great bet than to earn it through grafting on a hard day's work. Maybe it’s because of the thrill of the win, the risk involved, and the instant gratification. Or maybe it’s the glamour and because we didn't work for it. Either way it feels like easy money. Free money. And that’s worth celebrating.

By the way, if you're wondering, 'Faro' is a card game that was very popular in the 1800s until it was later surpassed by poker.

The safest way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.

An American humorist, cartoonist, and journalist, Kin Hubbard always got his point across by making us chuckle. And the above quote is no exception. He plays with literal meaning, yes your wallet will have more of a bulge, but his point is clear.

There’s no risk involved in folding your money over once, so it’s safe. But if you are looking to double your money, you need to step out of your comfort zone.

The guy who invented poker was bright, but the guy who invented the chip was a genius.

Using chips in casinos is probably how so much money gets bet in each game. When you win big, you know about it and you are literally rolling in it, but when you want make a bet, it doesn’t seem like much to put down a few chips. Especially the chips with higher value.

The guy who invented the chip worked out that this simple trick meant way more people would part with more money. It’s like spending with a credit card. When there’s no hard cash involved you lose a sense of the value.

Of course, another advantage is that it keeps games organized, and with chips being thrown around from player to game to player, they need to be durable, the kind of durable that paper money lacks.

A gambler never makes the same mistake twice. It's usually three or more times.

Terrence Murphy has written a lot about gambling over the years, and his alter ego, VP Pappy, is quoted across many gambling magazines. His observations about gambling tend to be insightful yet tongue-in-cheek, probably borne from his own experiences, and the quote above ticks those boxes.

We’ve all been there, believing with all our being that THIS roll is the one. And when it’s not, it’s the one after that. Or the one after that. And it goes on. But this doesn’t have to be your fate! There's more than enough strategic information out there to make sure you're playing your games of choice the right way.

I love blackjack. But I'm not addicted to gambling. I'm addicted to sitting in a semi circle.

A funny gambling quote from a much-loved comedian. Mitch Hedberg’s deadpan style appealed to audiences across his short-lived career and poked fun at everyday observations. He became something of a cult icon before his premature death.

Just like this quote, he used a lot of one-liners with snappy punchlines to get the laughs.

You know, horses are smarter than people. You never heard of a horse going broke betting on people.

Will Rogers was a Hollywood star of his time and led the field in political wit, and used his great sense of humor to entertain the public. This quote takes a direct approach, but the joke is still pretty funny. Funny and true as it ridicules us for our ways of having fun.

Casino Quotes Funny

If there weren't luck involved, I would win every time.

Known for being temperamental amongst other fellow famous gamblers, this professional has got himself the nickname of 'Poker Brat'. But with that fire comes talent, he’s won a record 14 World Series of Poker bracelets over the years, winning loads of money along the way!

We can see from his success that he’s very skilled and, from what he says above, might not be so lucky. That’s the beauty of games like poker, though. A mixture of strategy and luck will get you that win meaning that players with less ability might actually win against those with all the know-how. With luck thrown in, you never know what will happen and that’s what keeps players coming back over and over again for more.

We have picked nine of our favorite gambling quotes and listed them below, along with some details about the people that made them and our take on what they mean. These quotes stand out for us as they either contain excellent advice or are great reflections of what gambling is all about.

“Quit while you’re ahead. All the best gamblers do.”

This is a quote from Baltasar Gracián y Morales, a 17th century philosopher. We like it because, several hundred years later, it remains one of the single best pieces of gambling advice. If you can learn to quit when you are ahead, then you have an excellent chance of being a successful gambler.

This is an Irish proverb which highlights one of the biggest mistakes a gambler can make: chasing losses. In the same way that you have to know when to quit when you are ahead, there’s also a time to cut your losses and quit.

“Money won is twice as sweet as money earned.”

For many gamblers, this quote neatly sums why they gamble. It’s not just about the money itself, it’s the joy of winning it. The quote was from the movie The Color of Money, said by the character Fast Eddie Felson – played by Paul Newman.

“I’ve learned the lesson that the worst thing that can happen to a gambler is to let his recent losses or wins knock him off keel emotionally.”

Andrew Beyer highlighted one of the biggest failings of gamblers in this quote: letting emotions cloud judgment. Beyer was an expert on horse racing betting, writing four books on the subject. He also designed the Beyer Speed Figure, a system for rating Thoroughbred racehorses.

The origins of this proverb aren’t entirely clear. It’s a simple statement but entirely true. If a horse you have bet on wins, you’ll always wish you had bet more on it. The premise applies to any form of gambling.

“Once you start thinking you have nothing left to learn, you have everything to learn.”

Really, this quote could apply to life in general. It was actually made in the context of poker, by Steve Badger. Badger owned one of the first, and best, websites dedicated to educating poker players. In this quote he’s pointing out that if you think you know it all you are sadly mistaken.

“Gambling is not about how well you play the games, it’s really about how well you handle your money.”

This is from poker player V. P. Pappy. We could pick a number of quotes from him as he’s made several great ones, but this is probably our favorite in terms of the advice it contains. He is making the excellent point that good money management is absolutely essential to successful gambling.

Funny Gambling Sayings

“At gambling, the deadly sin is to mistake bad play for bad luck.”

This quote is from the James Bond book (and movie) Casino Royale, written by Ian Fleming. It emphasizes a mistake that many gamblers make: blaming bad luck instead of trying to work if they made a bad play or bet.

“There is a very easy way to return from a casino with a small fortune; go there with a large one.”

Something of a tongue in cheek quote this one, from Jack Yelton. He is essentially highlighting the fact that you are likely to lose money playing casino games. He’s right of course; the house does have an edge over the long term.

The Movie Casino Quotes

That doesn’t mean that casino games should be avoided at all costs, as they are great fun and it’s possible to win money if you get lucky. It’s just important to recognize that the odds are ultimately against you.